cofession

[sainishi]

namaste saibji

bahut dino se likhana cha rahi thi par socha sab sai hi meri madad nahi kar rahe hai baki logo ko apana dukhada suna ke kya fayada. aapne reply me mujhe jo kuch likha maine achi tarah se padha aur meri problem kya hai ye bhi shayad aapke samajh me aa gayi, isiliye aapne mujhe remark diya ke jo dayalvasini ji ne bataya mai use follow kyu nahi kar rahi hu.

Aapko kahana jitana aasan lagata hai karana utana aasan hai na, mujhe dayalvasini ji ki bat bhi achi tarah se samajh me aa gai. par meri problem ye hai ke koi bhi decision lene ke liye meri ATMIK AWASTHA itani shaktishali aur ekagra nahi ho pa rahi hai. mere andar negativity, emotionality , attachment itani badh gai hai ke mai chahate hua bhi ise nikal nahi pa rahi hu.
Mai apane andar ke in sare bhawo ko aur Maya ke roopo ko dekh rahi hu , samajh rahi hu par wo shakti nahi juta pa rahi hu jo inase nikal saku . isiliye maine sai se madad mangi thi. par khair.....

Mai aapko batadu ke mai Pichale 8 salo se PRAJAPITA BRAMHAKUMARI VISHWAVIDYALAY ME ghyan me hu.

[saib]

Dear SN,

Kahna Asan Hai Par Karna Nahi. Mai acchi tarah janta huan, agar nahi janta to tumhe dubara reply nahi karta. Tume Dayalvasini ka message follow nahi kiya, Mujhe bhi seriously nahi liya (no matter for me)………… But I could feel, It was not your intention. You had no control over your emotions. I could feel your pain, How your brain is reacting, disturbance in your aura, so much negative emotion through the way you were expressing to Sai…………but again I could see your struggle to change your life.  Burning in the fire of desires. If I come to be Hard, Dear. It is only a sense of Lust, Going to hurt you, But this is truth. What Love you Say. The one who has no purity of mind, Who is not loyal to his family or God. Just a structure of blood, flesh, bones, pus, stool and urine. Affection towards such structure, You call love. Love is so divine and it cannot happen this way. It is only you see good packaging without knowing what is inside, If you buy a can of cold drink by getting attracted towards beauty of its packaging and drink without feeling there are many living insects in drink. and if you come to know and still keep on drinking, again it is not love…but an addiction only.

When I said Practice “Vairagya” for time being, It was only solution to your problem. But you find difficult. I know it is difficult, But if you won’t be firm on path, How you will recover, If one is seriously ill – have to take medicine, No matter how bitter it is. You have to understand what is reality. Life cannot be wasted only on dreams/desires. You says you are attached for some years, I have seen people who have spent ages, but could not recover…………………. and I also have seen people attaining freedom from such worldly affections in short time.

You have to try, Harder and harder again and again without accepting failure, No failure is final unless you stop.

PRAJAPITA BRAMHAKUMARI VISHWAVIDYALAY, I have seen their system closely even for short time, and I know what they taught is more theoretical. Unit of time to set different phases of Yuga not at par with scriptures. They provide great Gyan, But Gyan alone can’t make anyone to rise in life. It is juts you store hundreds of crackers for diwali, but no use if could not arrange a match box, the spark that is needed to blast crackers. Similarly that spark is missing from your life. Activate that spark in your life and it will show you new light, bring a new you out of you  free from all past impacts.

Do you know importance of Human Birth??? Is life meant to be wasted like this?

My Favorite Shivananda shared:

You have already travelled over the 84 lakhs of Yonis (wombs) of the animal world. It is very fortunate of you that you have got this human body. Still you have not done anything (for the next birth). And therefore, you will have to repent for it. The days are passing away speedily.

You came alone (weeping), will go alone (weeping), no one will follow!

This is truth of life. At end no one will be attached to us, even not that one for whom we waste entire life. The one who is ours will be with us in due course, why we retain a wish for one who is not part of destiny. It brings only sorrows and pain in life.

Also why you love – To attain happiness? But is it really making you happy?

Be Practical. Being a follower of PRAJAPITA BRAMHAKUMARI VISHWAVIDYALAY you must have knowledge. Use that. One of the purpose of that organization is universal brotherhood, that I like most. Love means affection for all, Serving God in form of human without any expectation. Live a Big Life.

Don’t stop, Keep on trying again and again, In some fields one has to fall down many times just to learn stand firm and then move.

Discipline your Mind. Remove negativity from your life. YOU CAN DO. Accept it as a new life. Past is not in your hand, Use present for your better future.

Trust Baba without any doubt.  Gain Confidence, I have gone through worst phase what you are going through. When I could recover, so You. Key is only Patience and Faith!

All the Best!

Goodbye!

May Sai Bless You!

om sri sai ram!

[sainishi]

continoue... for 1 st post

Maine jabase hosh sambhala tab se pata nahi kyu jo maine kabhi gita me padha bhi nahi tha aur is Sansar ka satya hai wo sari bate mere andar bhari hui thi, mujhe bachpan se is Mithya Sansar se pareh hamesha us PARAMPITA ko pane ki dhun lagi rahati thi, maine pagalo jaise bhakti ki hai aur hamesha usake is sansar ko is atma ke chole ko janane ki koshish ki hai. Par kahate hai na JO HAMESHA BHAGWAN KO PANE KI CHAH RAKHATA HAI USE AAM INSANO SE JADA BADI BADI MUSHKILO ME SE GUJARANA PADATA HAI. Aur ye bat aapko batane ki jaroorat nahi ke har manushya atma ko jis janam me jo bhi prapti hoti hai wo usike karmo ka phal hota hai ,hamare hato kabhi kabhi bure karm sirf is karan hote hai kyuki hum APANI ATMIK STHITI KO BHULKAR, PARAMPITA KO BHULKAR DEHBHAN ME AUR MAI ME AAKAR KARAM KARATE HAI. Aur saibji ek aam insan ko to is bat ka bhan bhi nahi hota ke wo kya hai aur kya kar raha hai . Aur in sari bato ka ghyan hamare atma me hona isake liye bhi prabhu ashirwad aur punya karmo ki jaroorat hoti hai , aur aap ye bhi janate hai ke har insan ke liye jindagi jite hua aisi awastha prapt karana aur DUKH - SUKH ke feelings se pareh rahkar karmyogi bankar karm karana possible nahi. Aisi awastha to koi virala hi pa sakata hai.Aur aap ye bhi janate hai ke Manushya ko jo bhi karm bhogane padate hai usaka swaroop bhi alag alag hota hai , SHARIRIK BIMARIYA, SAMBADHIYO, RISHTEDARO DWARA TAKLIFE, PAISE KI SAMSYAYE, DHARAM RAJ KI SAJA, AUR KARMBHOG KA SUKSHM ROOP HOTA HAI, DUKH KI, PARESHANI, TAKLIF KI FEELING, KISI ATMA KA SADA APANE UPAR BOJH MAHSOOS HONA, JINDAGI ME PRAGATI NA HONA. ye bhi hamare karmbhog hi sajaye hai. sirf ye ke kisi ka swaroop bada hota hai aur kisi ka sukshm. Aur aap jo SUKH - DUKH , VAIRAGYA ki bat kar rahe hai usake liye pahale ye sukhsm bhog ye jo DUKHAD FEELINGS KE ROOP ME HAMARE ATMA PAR ASAR DALATE HAI usase nikalana jaroori hota hai. Hame present Janam me jo bhi log milate hai wo bhi hamare karam bhog chukt karane ke hisab se hi milate hai. isiliye kisi kisi atma dwara hame bahut sukh milata hai aur kisi kisi dwara hame bahut dukh milata hai. par ham isaka dosh un atma ko hi dete hai ke falane ne mujhe itana sukh diya aur falane ne mujhe itana dukh diya. par isame samane wale ka koi bhi dosh hota nahi hai. Agar koi PRATIBHATAI PATIL bhi banati hai to usake kisi na kisi janmo ke karmo ke karan banati hai aur agar Koi TAWAYAF bhi ban jati hai to usake karmo ke karan banati hai . Par saibji ham jin karmo ki saja bhugatate hai wo DEHBHAN me kiye hua bure karm hote hai , jise hum AGHYAN AWASTHA me karate hai phir bhi hame unaki saja bhugatani padati hai. HAME IS SANSAR KA JHUTA DRAMA JANANA CHAHIYE YE BAAT SACH HAI, PAR AGAT HAR KOI SUKH AUR DUKH KI AWASTHA SE PAREH HO JATA TO BHAGWAN SANSAR KA YE DRAMA HI NAHI RACHATE AUR NA HI YE SRUSHTICHAKRA CHAL PATA. phir bhagwan kise kahate aur sansar kise kahate.

Itana sab clearification dene ke piche mera sirf ek hi uddesh tha ke aap ne mujhe jo bhi bate batai unaka mujhe bhalibhati GHYAN hai par meri atma par na jane kin janmo ke aise vyarth feelings, vyarth bhawnao, negative thinking ke kaunase bhog hai jo itana Ghyan hone ke bawjood bhi mai unase nikal nahi pa rahi hu. Mujhe aap ki batai hui sari bato ka ghyan ya tathapi mai wo dusaro ko deti hu Par pata nahi kyu mere andar wo shakti nahi jag pa rahi hai ke mai isaka yatharth riti upyog kar pau.

Isaka reason sirf itana hai , ke mujhe to apane karmo ke karam bachpan se hi har kisi se dukh aur dhoke mile , isiliye shayad mai bachpan se duniya ke prati vairagi bhaw se bhagwan ko pane ki chah me lag gai. par ye jo insan hai jisake bare me maine pahale bataya tha , usake bareme mere sai janate hai ke mere man me koi pap nahi hai, maine hamesha prabhu ke diye hua sanskaro se khud bhukha rah kar dusaro ko khilane ki koshish ki hai, hamesha bhagwan ke raste pe chalate hua garibo ki madad karane ki koshish ki hai, bachpan se prarthana me sirf yahi manga hai ke duniya me jitani bhi ASHANT,KAMJOR,PARESHANI AUR TAKLIF ME FASI ATMAYE HAI UNAKA KALYAN HO AUR MUJHE ITANI SHAKTI DE KE HAMESHA DUSARO KE PRATI SADAIV SHUBH BHAVANA KARATI RAHU. I Hope mai aapko jo batana cha rahi hu wo aapke samajh me aa gaya hoga. Par saibji meri jindagi pichale aath salo se wo atma ek aisi hai jisake bhog mai tamam koshishe karane ke bawjood bhi mita nahi pa rahi hu. mujhe sab kuch samajhata hai ke kya sahi hai aur kya galat par use follow karane ki shakti pata nahi mere andar kyu nahi aa rahi hai. maine apane bhagwan se us insan ke liye hamesha mafi mangi hai ke mujhe us insan ke karan jo bhi depression mahasus hota hai, mera man sada usake chinta me pata nahi kyu par laga rahata hai, mere andar usake karan sada nirasha bhari rahati hai wo hamesha hamesha ke liye jalkar bhasm ho jaye aur maine us insan ka jis kisi janam me jo kuch bhi bigada ho usake liye mujhe mafi mil jaye .MAI DIL AUR DIMAG SE US INSAN SE PURI TARAH SE DETTACH HO JAU, Pichale kai salo se ye koshish kar rahi hu saib ji ab aap bataiye mujhe itana ghyan hone ke bawjood bhi usaka kya fayada hai. Pata nahi koi aisi chij mujhe feel hoti hai jo mujhe is negativity , is gandi yaad aur is attachment se nikalane nahi deti. Rat din chinta kar kar ke mai mari ja rahi hu. Aur abhi aap hi bataiye jis ladaki ke andar bhagwan ne wo sab ghyan dala ho jisake base pe usane ye duniya banai thi usaka agar mujhe kuch fayada nahi ho raha hai, agar itana vishwas karane bawjood bhi sai mere ye paap bhasm karake mujhe agar chain ki jindagi nahi de sakate to kya mera vishwas nahi dagmagayega ?

Mujhe aaj tak yaad nahi ke maine is janam me kisi ka bura kiya ho , hamesha dusaro ki madad karane ki koshish ki hai ye bat alag hai ke hamesha sabane mujhe dhokha hi diya hai. par sai to sabkuch janate hai na ? maine unase kabhi apane liye koi badi chij nahi mangi sirf itana hi mana hai jindagi ke aakhari mod tak mai tujhe kabhi bhulu nahi , mere andar tere vishwas ki jyot hamesha jagmagati rahe kyuki mera usake siway koi nahi hai. Par mujhe bachpan se lekar aaj tak yaad nahi ke bhagwan ne kabhi mere taraf dhan dene ki koshish ki ho. maine apane jindagi ko hamesha ye samajh kar apana liya ke shayad bhagwan mere andar sahanshkti bharane ke liye aur mera kuch na kuch acha karane ke liye ye sab kar rahe honge . maine jab se hosh sambhala tab se sukh nahi dekha par phir bhi hamesha bhagwan se pyar karati rahi.Par is insan ne mujhe abhi hairan kar diya saibji. jindagi ke is mod pe mujhe kuch bhi sujh nahi raha hai. Maine sai sirf apane man ki shanti aur us insan se puri dettachment mangi. par sai meri utani madad karane ko bhi ready nahi. Maine sari koshishe kar li par us insane ka khayal mere andar se jata nahi aur mai hamesha depressed, nirash, negative bani rahati hu. Maine apane psychological treatment bhi karai par phir mai apane andar nai jindagi jine ki ummid nahi jaga pai.
BOLIYE KYA SAI MERI ITANI BHI MADAD NAHI KAR SAKATE, MAINE APANE JINDAGI KE HAR TAKLIF KO APANE KARM BHOG SAMAJH KAR KATA PAR BHAGWAN KA HATH NAHI CHODA TO KYA MUJHE WO ITANI SHAKTI NAHI DE SAKATE KE MAI IS DEPRESSION , IS GANDI JINDAGI SE PAREH HOKAR , HAMESHA KHUSH RAHKAR EK ACHI JINDAGI JI SAKU ? KYU ITANI BHAKTI KARANE KE BAD BHI SAI NE MERA TAMASHA BANA KE RAKHA HAI ? MAINE KAI BAR SAI KE 9 VRAT KIYE, SAI CHARITRA KA KAI BAR PARAYAN KIYA, YATHASHAKTI GARIBO KO KHANA KHILAKAR APANE UPAR KE YE BOJH KHATM KARANE KI KOSHISH KI , UNAKE NAAM KA NIRANTAR JAAP KARA KE DEKHA, ATMA AUR PARAMATMA KE SWAROOP ME YOG ( MEDITATION) KARAKE APANE ATMA KE PAPO JALANE KI KOSHISH KI , itani sari koshishe karane ke bad mujhe bataiye aur kya karu? Bachpan se itana vishwas karane ke bawjood bhi jo sai meri itani taklif dur karake ke mujhe man shanti aur shakti nahi de sakata kya usake prati mera vishwas hilega nahi ?

 Wo to mere sawalo ka jawab nahi de pa rahe hai ho sake to aap unase puchkar mujhe samadhan karak jawab dena varna unsase kahe ke meri ye gandi jindagi wapas le le mujhe na unaki jaroorat hai aur na unake jindagi ke . Varna aisi gandi dard aur taklif se bhari jindagi jine ke bajaye mai khud use khatm kar lungi aur phir wo tamasha dekhata rahe.

[saib]

 || अव्वल अल्लाह नूर उपाया, कुदरत के सब बन्दे एक नूर ते सब जग उपजा, कोण भले को मंदे ||

जल मात्र जल होता है . हम गन्दी नाली का जल जिसे दूषित और दुर्गन्ध युक्त मानकर दूर करते है, वही जल जब अनेक पर्कारियाओं से गुजरकर शुद्ध हो जाता है, तो न केवल  अपनी प्यास बुझाते है , इश्वर को भी अर्पण करते है. समस्त जग इश्वर का ही रूप है . माया का परपंच . सभी इश्वर से उत्पन होते है और अंत मे जब सृष्टि नए युग मे परवेश करती है , तो इश्वर मे ही लीन हो जाते है.

मै तुमे बुरा नहीं समझता, साईं तो पाप हरता है , उनके चरणों का ध्यान करने से तो बड़े बड़े पापी भी पुण्यात्माओं मे परिवर्तित हो जाते है , वोह किसी को बुरा नहीं समझते !

समस्या मात्र इतनी की तुम स्वम को बुरा समझ रही हो .

इस बार मै कोई राय या उपदेश नहीं दे रहा. तुम स्वम समझदार हो. बस इतना ही तुम एक बंद दरवाजे पर खड़ी उसे खोलने का प्रयतन कर रही हो, पर तुमारी बहुत कोशिश करने पर भी द्वार नहीं खुल पा रहा  ........... पर तुम यह नहीं समझ पा रही यह द्वार बाहर की और नहीं भीतर की और खुलता है ....................एक बार भीतर की और खोलने की कोशिश करो .....फिर सालों या महीनो मे जो नहीं हुआ पल भर मे घटित हो जायेगा ....हर भार से मुक्ति, एक महान जीवन..........

अपने  जीवन से ऊँचा उठो , तुम विचार नहीं हो , अपने विचारो को देखो, गंभीरता पूर्वक , बिना हस्तक्षेप किये ,  धीरे धीरे परिवर्तन होने लगेगा ................

अंत मे पुण: यही की जीवन तुमारा है , किताबी ज्ञान से ऊपर उठो , साईं के मधुर नाम से जुडो , सब समस्याएँ / इच्छाएँ अपने आप हटने लगती है, और एक आन्दमय जीवन साकार होने लगता है ...........

ॐ श्री साईं राम !