Thanks Aqua & Manmeetji.
Baba, thank You for showing me the truth. Now that I do know the truth, I also know he didnt do it on purpose. Maybe it changed my entire life, but I was not wrong when my heart felt he was right and met him the first three times. I couldnt understand what was wrong with him but could sense something was drastically wrong. My heart was right Baba. And one of my closest friends the one I trusted, in reality he didnt decieve me. He was not even aware of his situation himself. How could he ever harm anyone else.
How could I think that way about him Baba? How could I do this to save my relationship? I became so selfish... in trying desperately to save my relationship I misunderstood Abhi and treated him so badly. So badly Baba... He was only seeking support. He kept telling me... no one understands me. The doctors have termed me medically ill. You do understand me. Just pls pls pls be there with me. He kept saying it Baba. He really needed me to be there. I didn't go... I listened to my love, saved my relationship and left him crying and craving for someone to just listen to him. How could I be so selfish and heartless Baba? And for two years I believed he was lying to me, pretending to be ill just to cover up his mistakes. Instead of feeling ashamed of not being there for him I always connected him and every incident connected to him somewhere as the cause for my relationship break-down. When he had not even done anything. He was so innocent.
It was not his fault but the insecurity of the one I love. I couldnt manage his insecurity and... how could I so easily put the blame on someone else? Baba he was ill. The least anyone could have done was to be there for him. I didnt even wait for him to recover completely. I treated him so badly. Please forgive me Baba. And please heal him. How much of pain will he go thru now. He is such a spiritual person. So brilliant. He's suffered too much Baba. He's done so much good and changed so many lives for the better. Please stop testing him now Baba.
Baba, I wish the best of him. May he get back all that he lost and much more. He deserves the best... the best of the best in everything! Please please please bless him Baba. Please heal him. And please Baba, one lil request... if he doesnt remember that phase and doesn't remember me, may his memory never come back. He deserves all the peace on earth Baba. Please help him heal. And please forgive me Baba. The day he heals, I'll consider myself forgiven. And I know that day will come soon.
I've comited many sins Baba. Thank You for bringing this one forth. I would have never forgiven myself if I realized this years later and kept thinking of him as the cause for my pain. Thank You Baba, for showing me the light. For opening my eyes. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You sooooooooooo much!
The day he heals, I'll consider one sin forgiven. Today onwards, till the time he heals, he and his family will be on my Reiki list. Baba, just give me the strength to channel Reiki as much as I can and religiously without missing a day. I owe it to them Baba. I really do.
Om Sai Ram
Topic: Please forgive me (Read 20374 times)