Three things in a relationship!By Sri Sri Ravi Shankar
Three things are essential in any relationship:
- Right perception
- Right observation
and
- Right expression.
What is the secret of a relationship? How does a relationship develop? First is the attraction. You are attracted
to a person. But if you get what you are attracted to very easily, the charm disappears quickly and it dies out
very fast. But if it is just a little bit difficult to have what you are attracted to, then you develop a love for it.
Have you experienced this...?
You fall in love, after that what happens? After a while, the soap opera begins. Because you love someone;
you give yourself completely to that relationship; you start putting demands on that relationship. The moment
this starts, the love diminishes. All the thrill, joy, everything just seems to fade away. Then you say,
"Oh! I have made a mistake." Now there's a struggle and pain to get out of the relationship. And after you
have got out of it, you get into another, and another...The same story is repeated.
Everybody wants to know how to make a relationship long lasting. Do you want to know the secret about
relationships? Three things are essential in any relationship: right perception, right observation and right
expression. Often, people say that nobody understands them. Instead of saying, "No one understands me,
" you can say that you have not expressed yourself properly. If you speak Russian to a Spaniard, he will
definitely not understand you. To express yourself properly, you need the right perception. Right perception
can happen when you see yourself by getting into the shoes of the other person.
But right perception alone is not enough; you also need right observation. The way you react when you
perceive something is important. How do you feel inside? Observing your own mind is essential. This observation
within you: observation of sensation, observation of tendencies and observation of patterns form the second
aspect of relationship. After you observe yourself and perceive the other, it is the right expression. Expressing
ourselves in the right manner is important. The whole of life is a lesson in just these three things: perception,
observation, and expression. Every mistake you make is really not a mistake; it's a learning process of the
three vital aspects of life. Love is essential in relationships and it's not about attraction alone. In attraction,
there's aggressiveness; in love, there is submission. Though attraction forms the first step you cannot stand
on the first step for too long. You have to move on to the next pedestal. That is love.
When you're centered, and when you let go of your feverishness, then your charm is long lasting. The nearer
a person comes to you, the more charm there will be in the relationship.
Be blessed!
Love & Light!
Om Sai Ram!