OM SAI RAM DEVJI
<...anyway , looks this forum being run by few typecast pshycos >
No Devji I respectfully digress here, won't use these words. The Forum IS THERE for imporatant part of praying in combination, for people in agony like your case. It is motivated WITH SAME GOOD INTENTIONS, as combined prayers have a cumulative effect. AND I can see few dedicated individuals like Devbaniji, praying for ALL despite her problems However, the so called Feminine Bonding takes its course and had you been DEVI-S instead of DEV S (even with 5% of agony you are facing) the reactions and prayers would have been entirely opposite and different, AND those are the lines for running FOR, and there have been instances of damning or caressing. I had also hoped that with problems with genuine problems like your's atleast Mods will take the trouble to make the topic sticky for sometime, but then again you are a X-Y.
But surely nobody is a psycho here, I can vouch for, and deep down "some" people are feeling genuinely for you. As BABA is the driving force here. AND we want that BABA should make you happy and at peace, and give you the best ever.
<.....I feel sorry for such folks who seriously need self realization . Half of my family members are in Hospital now , my career is in standstill , and what else you want to know dear Greatest Devotees? Now you come and tell me that it is because of my past karma ? yes , if it bcos ofpast karma then show me my this life's karma ? would you be able to come to this forum and chant sai sai when you know your family is collapsing or collapsed >
Devji Yes I agree, NOBODY will be able to come and chant anywhere in the hopeless situation like you, and . And many times it is not YOUR own Karmas or any Past, but umpteen other reasons, like VAMACHAR KRIYAS which people often do out of spite and jealousy, the PITRU DOSHA because of some ancestoral problem, the Situational problems due to residing at wrong place due to presence of negative vibrations, and even as my GURUJI also said sometimes even due to the accumulated positive, as say the practice of NETI NETI (not this, not that) meditation (Meera Bai the classic example), in previous births, but which is not complete, or there is no Guru to hold the hand, results in the same things attracting the person here and now, but he is unsuccessful (Law of Reaction as it was rejected by him previously). SO ALL THIS BLAMING ON PAST KARMAS is only "Partial Truth".
AND REALLY I FEEL BAD as your case is not of simple frustration but "AGONY AND HOPELESSNESS", hope BABA hears and HEARS now. And as you said,rightly also, BABA said about the judgemental mind.
I also feel that your words are like nectar, AS IF BABA himself has shown us the mirror, how deluded we are, just thinking we are Great Bhaktas, bloating with ego, without even knowing the B of Bhakti, to reflect on the same.
BUT BEFORE I HOPE THAT A PERSON LIKE YOU IS HEALED AND HAPPY. SAI PLEASE
OM SAI RAM OM SAI RAM OM SAI RAM OM SAI RAM