4urblessingsji... Please calm down and think.
What is it that I am doing to help myself? Baba can only give us the strength to fight our battles. We have to work towards them.
What is it that I can improve in myself as a human being? Can I make any changes in me to be a better, more compassionate, loving person? What is it that my partner seeks? Can I make any attempts in giving him for now rather than expecting from him and life? Can I just focus on giving for now rather than asking? I have much more & am much happier compared to millions & millions of women.
Am I creating problems or adding to them because of a selfish friend who wants to spend his life with me... (NOT LOVE) cause if he loved me, he would have never tried to break my marriage.
My husband may be under the influence of someone else or may be wrong. Completely wrong. But am I not equally under the influence of a friend who is trying to create problems?
Will what I am doing currently help me in anyway? Doubting and confronting and nurturing negativity, hatred and dissatisfaction never helped anyone. Am I doing anything to get it out of my system and focussing on being a better person?
Why have I forgotten myself? In the past few months have I done anything to feel better for myself, be a more interesting, more developed person?
I am not throwing questions at you to add to your pain or prove anything at all. N you don't need to answer any of it at this forum... But you need to think and do a self assessment of yourself.
STEP ONE :
When theres already a major financial problem, do not add to it & do not allow people who add to it by stressing you with all sorts of talks about your marriage. Sort your financial problem. Get a job. Learn something new that would add value to your personality so that whatever happens next you're in a better position to face the world. I have learnt from my mistakes the hard way & if I were you, I would have kept the friend out of my life forever & seen to it that no other friend crosses the line of his or her limits enough to create problems in my family by sorry to use the word... poisoning me against them.
STEP TWO :
Ok. Fact accepted. Hubby doesnt love me, not happy with this marriage as it is now. WHAT NEXT? Am I just going to waste time crying over it and expecting a miracle to fall into my lap or am I going to stand up, get strong... tell myself I have the courage to face this and emerge a winner out of this with or without anyone's support? If I'm going to tell Baba - Baba, I am standing up to fight this out, to sort this out lovingly, with confidence and loads of hard work... just be with me... WHAT IS IT THAT I PLAN TO DO??? Can I do a course? Can I take tuitions or do a small job and gather the money to build myself, my personality? What is it that I can add to my personality to turn myself into the kind of woman every man wakes up dreaming of having as his partner? How will I be able to do all it takes to be that? Love, marriage and every relationship takes a lot of hard work... Am I willing to give and put in that much? HOW? Where do I start? When do I start?
I feel if you keep the fact that your husband isn't interested aside and just work on building yourself into a better, better, even better individual with complete faith in God... only two things can happen - Either your husband comes back to you realizing your true worth & sticks to you for life or you get someone even better.
Forget the situation, the society & what men or women do or have done since millions of centuries or will do for decades to come. All this philosophy & thinking is NOT going to help you in anyway. It just helps you sink deeper into self-pity when you should be getting up, getting stronger to do a self-evaluation & rise above this.
I'm sorry to be so blunt about this.... n trust me this is genuinely out of pure intent to help you out as a lil sister. I do not wish to give you pity & gentle words that help you get into more of self-pity.
Please understand, if you really want to have the kind of happy life you want... you cant be wasting your time stressing & worrying over this. Even a 1000 friends sympathising with you - its not going to help! Baba wants you to get stronger. Ure an intelligent girl. Come on... get up and fight it out. We are all with you. & we'll all be with you thru this... all thru... Baba has already given you a backing and strong support of so many people who understand your pain, help you with tips & make you feel good. Baba has already blessed you with a strong family here which will stand by you thru this and keep giving you the strength & support you desire.
NOW ITS YOUR TURN TO ACT!
Be strong girl. Find yourself a job or do a course. Be independant first. Rest all can happen later.
God bless you with all the strength. I hope, I really really hope you do not take this message negatively as something thats harsh & rude. I really really hope you keep that friend of yours out of your life at least for now & stand up & fight this out with conviction & strength. Learn new stuff & build yourself strong enough for your husband to never be able to ignore. To be that woman... ur husband & every other man would seek... Rise above this. Build urself into that... which none can ignore.
Om Sai Ram
Topic: Pls Help Me BABAJI (Read 10346 times)