Dear pavithraji
Do not give up, please. Think about Sai Baba and use some mantras. On my post at: http://forum.spiritualindia.org/mantras-and-slokas/mantra-for-all-diseases-t22144.0.html
there are many mantra to help you.
For Example:
Rama (Healing Mantra):
Om Apadamapa Hataram Dataram Sarva Sampadam
Loka Bhi Ramam Sri Rama Bhuyo Bhuyo Namamyaham
"This is a long mantra to put in a chapter for those just starting off, but is placed here because it is the most powerful healing mantra I have ever encountered. The very rough translation is, 'Om, Oh most compassionate Rama please send your healing energy right here to the earth, to the earth (twice for emphasis.)'
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Perhaps the following information will help you to believe in Sai Baba.
Home > Spiritual Research > Spiritual healing
http://www.spiritualresearchfoundation.org/spiritualresearch/spiritualhealing/
There are various spiritual remedies to alleviate the difficulties in our life. They are as follows.
Section 1 - Articles on spiritual healing
Section 2 - FAQs on Spiritual healing methods
Section 3 - Spiritual healing remedies
Healing remedies on oneself
Chanting as a spiritual remedy for mental illnesses
Chanting as a spiritual remedy for physical illnesses
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Part 1: Spiritual healing chants for mental illnesses
http://www.spiritualresearchfoundation.org/spiritualresearch/spiritualhealing/chants_MentalHealth/index.php?id=57
Part 2: Spiritual healing chants for physical illnesses
http://www.spiritualresearchfoundation.org/spiritualresearch/spiritualhealing/PhysicalIllnesses/index.php?id=1Here some mantras for mental illnesses:
Restlessness, fear or pressure
Om Gan Ganapataye Namahaa - Sree Durgaadevyai Namahaa
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Anxiety
Om Gan Ganapataye Namahaa - Sree Gurudev Datta
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Depression
Om Namo Bhagavate Vaasudevaaya - Sree Gurudev Datta
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Insomnia
Sree Durgaadevyai Namahaa - Sree Gurudev Datta
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Nightmares
Sree Gurudev Datta - Om Gan Ganapataye Namahaa
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Thoughts about self-harm
Sree Durgaadevyai Namahaa - Om Namah Shivaaya - Om Namo Bhagavate Vaasudevaaya – Sree Hanumate Namahaa
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Thoughts about harming others
Om Namo Bhagavate Vaasudevaaya - Sree Durgaadevyai Namahaa
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Thoughts about harming Saints
Om Namah Shivaaya - Om Namo Bhagavate Vaasudevaaya - Sree Durgaadevyai Namahaa - Sreeraama Jai Raama Jai Jai Raama