Gud morning dear lord....
I am sorry for wasting my time and energy in things that are meaningless. I will not do this again. Yesterday, we made another set of payment to the seller. Baba...i am happy that my father will finally be close to me. I am sad when i think about last year when my mother was on her death bed. Last 24th, we stopped her platellete compensation and let her pass out in the ICU. There was nothing else we could do. I still remember the discussion we had with the doctor. We were keeping her alive and on ventilator and were pumping in things fully knowing she would never come back. That day - 24th May 2009, we decided to put an end to her agony. We wanted her to go in peace. And i think 24th was the day when she received the vibhuti from shirdi. today - one year later - i am reliving the terrible days. I am sad about what has happened. But yes...i am also thankful to u baba - for opening avenues for me to be closer to my father. Its been a long and tough year for all of us....
I meandered and blundered through the emotional and spiritual turmoil. I seeked help where ever i could...tried to take refuge in different elements. Finally i reached u.....more than me reaching u...it was u who reached out to me....
I still remember vividly the dream where u appeared. So baba....that was clear indication that u are going to be taking care of things for me provided i listen to u...
Baba..through these years and times, i promised to do so many things...and always managed to break them. In fact, it doesnt bother me now. Thats the sad state of affairs.
The only promise i seem to be keeping is the one i made when my mother died - that i will take care of my father. I am still working on it.
i am rambling....but baba....all i can say is u have made me a stronger human being.....