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Author Topic: Jokes and Sociomoral atmosphere  (Read 59555 times)

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Offline kumarnsks

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Re: Jokes keeps us going
« Reply #30 on: October 03, 2010, 09:42:34 AM »
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  • good jokes, please keep on posting such joke, it gives relief from daily tensions.

    jai sai krishan


     

    ;D

    A husband was trying to prove to his wife that women talk more than men. He showed her a study which indicated that men use about 10,000 words per day, whereas women use 20,000 words per day. His wife thought about this for a while. She then told her husband that women use twice as many words as men because they have to repeat everything they say. Her husband looked stunned. He said "What?"
       
     ;D  ;D

    Offline Dipika

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #31 on: October 06, 2010, 04:51:51 AM »
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  • Hemadpant, now describes another witty incident, in which Sai Baba played a peace-maker's part. There was one devotee by name Damodar Ghanashyama Babare alias Anna Chinchanikar. He was simple, rough and straightforward. He cared for nobody, always spoke plainly and carried all dealings in cash. Though he looked outwardly harsh and uncompromising, he was good natured and guileless. So Sai Baba loved him. One day, like others serving Sai Baba in their own way, this Anna was, one noon standing prone and was shampooing the left arm of Sai Baba, which rested on the kathada (railing). On the right side, one old widow named Venubai Koujalgi whom Sai Baba called mother and all others Mavsibai, was serving Sai Baba in her own way. This Mavsibai was an elderly woman of pure heart. She clasped the fingers of both her hands round the trunk of Sai Baba and was at this time kneading Sai Baba's abdomen. She did this so forcibly that Sai Baba's back and abdomen became flat (one) and Sai Baba moved from side to side. Anna on the other side was steady, but Mavsibai's face moved up and down with her strokes. Once it so happened that her face came very close to Anna's. Being of a witty disposition she remarked - "Oh, this Anna is a lewd (bad) fellow, he wants to kiss me. Even being so old with grey hair he feels no shame in kissing me." These words enraged Anna and he pulled up his sleeves and said - "You say that I am an old bad fellow, am I quite a fool? It is you that have picked up a quarrel and are quarreling with me". All the persons, present there were enjoying this encounter between them. Sai Baba Who loved both of them equally and wanted to pacify them, managed the affair very skillfully. Lovingly He said - "Oh Anna, why are you unnecessarily raising this hue and cry? I do not understand what harm or impropriety is there, when the mother is kissed?" Hearing these words of Sai Baba, both of them were satisfied and all the persons laughed merrily and enjoyed Sai Baba's wit to their heart's content.

    Sai baba let your holy lotus feet be our sole refuge.OMSAIRAM
    साईं बाबा अपने पवित्र चरणकमल ही हमारी एकमात्र शरण रहने दो.ॐ साईं राम


    Dipika Duggal

    Offline gina482

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #32 on: October 11, 2010, 06:33:37 AM »
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  • Wife: 'What are you doing?'
    Husband: Nothing.
    Wife: 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.'
    Husband: 'I was looking for the expiry date.'


    Wife: I hate the beggar who came yesterday!

    Husband: Why??

    Wife: I gave him food yesterday & today he gifted me a book "How to Cook"!!

    Offline Rashi

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #33 on: November 09, 2010, 01:29:17 AM »
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  • A Tiger killed a Sardar in a Zoo.. :P

    A Monkey asked: "Why did you Particularly killed a Sardar in the Crowd?"

    Tiger Replied: " Aur nahi toh kya...kabse kahe ja raha tha...ITTNI BADI BILLI..ITTNI BADI BILLI:) :) :D :D

    Offline Rashi

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #34 on: November 09, 2010, 10:57:10 PM »
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  • A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in-law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs awoke to find her mother gone :o. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

    The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick bush, and a large male lion stood facing her.

    The wife cried, "What are we going to do? ???"

    "Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it. :D :D ;D"

    Offline Rashi

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #35 on: November 10, 2010, 11:05:09 PM »
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  • Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. God comes and says, "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St. Peter."

    With that said and done, the next time God looked, the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were dominated by their women was 100 miles long, and in the line of men that dominated their women, there was only one man.

    God got mad and said, " >:( You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created, you in my image and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only, one of my sons that stood up and made me proud. Learn from him! Tell them my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line ????"

    And the man replied, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here." :) ;D  :P :D
                 


    Offline adwaita

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #36 on: November 11, 2010, 03:27:38 AM »
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  • hahaha remember this one. gud one.

    Offline Rashi

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #37 on: November 11, 2010, 11:51:55 PM »
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  • A man in a hot air balloon, realising he was lost, reduced altitude and spotted a woman below.
      He descended further and shouted to the lady “Excuse me,  ??? can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don’t know where I am :o.”
     The woman below replied, “ You’re in a hot air balloon, hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground.
      You’re between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude.”
     “You must be in IT” said the balloonist.  “Actually I am,” replied the woman, “How did you know?”
     “Well,” answered the balloonist, “everything you have told me is technically correct but I’ve no idea what to make of your information and the fact is I’m still lost.  Frankly, you’ve not been much help at all.  If anything, you’ve delayed my trip.”  
    The woman below responded, “You must be in Management”  “I am,” replied the balloonist, “but how did you know?”  
    “Well,” said the woman, “you don’t know where you are or where you’re going :P.  You have risen to  where you are due to a large quantity of hot air.  You made a promise, which you’ve no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems.  The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it’s my fault. :) ;D :D
    [/b]
    « Last Edit: November 11, 2010, 11:53:35 PM by Rashi »

    Offline Rashi

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #38 on: November 14, 2010, 11:42:53 PM »
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  • Tech support: I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.
    Customer:       OK.
    Tech Support:  Did you get a pop-up menu?
    Customer:        No.
    Tech Support:  Ok. Right-Click again.  Do you see a pop-up
                          menu?

    Customer:       No.
    Tech Support:   OK, Sir.  Can you tell me what you have done up
                          until this point?

    Customer:         Sure.  You told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote “click” twice.

    Offline adwaita

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #39 on: November 22, 2010, 10:00:10 PM »
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  • The new wife was being welcomed at the husband's home in a traditional manner. As expected she gave a speech:

    "My dear family, I thank you for welcoming me in my new home and family", she said "Firstly, my being here does not mean that I would want to change your way of life, your routine. No, I will never do that, never in a million years".

    "What do you mean my child?" Asked the father in law.

    "What I mean dad is (looking at her father in law):

    Those who used to wash dishes must carry on washing them.

    Those who used to do the laundry must carry on doing it.

    Those who cooked shouldn't stop at my account, and those who used to Clean should continue cleaning".

    "Then what are you here for?" Asked the mother in law.

    "As for me, my job is to entertain your son!"

    Offline shekarvani

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #40 on: November 22, 2010, 11:57:09 PM »
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  • Nice joke adwaita.
    Thank you

    Offline Rashi

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #41 on: November 24, 2010, 02:18:24 AM »
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  • Dipika Didi
    I am sorry i couldnt get the meaning of your post.
    What has happened wrong...?
    All are respectable members & Baba knows each one of us..and he knows what we are..
    he is watching us...
    Baba will think The Best about us and for us.
    But still why are you so worried...what is wrong?

    om shri sainathaya namah

    Offline saib

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #42 on: November 24, 2010, 02:45:22 AM »
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  • Don't worry Dear. Baba knows all what is happening. In his world nothing can happen without his knowledge and wish. Just know his timing is Perfect. and style is unique!

    om sri sai ram!

    If we keep quiet today, what will happen tomorrow? ...should we  keep quiet when something wrong happens inside the Mandir ???

    Admin...Mods ...helpers and respectable members...???

    ?

    BABA will think we all are jokers
    om sai ram!
    Anant Koti Brahmand Nayak Raja Dhi Raj Yogi Raj, Para Brahma Shri Sachidanand Satguru Sri Sai Nath Maharaj !
    Budhihin Tanu Janike, Sumiro Pavan Kumar, Bal Budhi Vidhya Dehu Mohe, Harahu Kalesa Vikar !
    ........................  बाकी सब तो सपने है, बस साईं ही तेरे अपने है, साईं ही तेरे अपने है, साईं ही तेरे अपने है !!

    Offline Dipika

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #43 on: November 24, 2010, 03:31:49 AM »
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  • Jab jago tabhi savera


    Whenever you undertake to do something, do it thoroughly or not at all.


    Sai baba

    साईं बाबा अपने पवित्र चरणकमल ही हमारी एकमात्र शरण रहने दो.ॐ साईं राम


    Dipika Duggal

    Offline shilohgomz

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    Re: Jokes keeps us going
    « Reply #44 on: December 14, 2010, 10:20:59 PM »
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  • Very funny joke :

    Teacher: Where does God live?
    Little boy: I think he lives in our bathroom.
    Teacher: Why do you say that?
    Little boy: Well, every morning my daddy bangs on the door and says, 'God, are you still in there?'

     


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