Never lose faith in Baba
Dear Sai Devotees, this write-up is for those people in particular who have believed in Baba and due to certain reasons are not having that firm faith which they early had or are in some kind of doubt.
I was married for two years and was expecting a baby it was only two months and was aborted on the third month. I thought maybe after few months I will have another but months passed by and nothing happened than it was a year and half and I was desperate as to what has happened why I am not having a baby so started praying to Baba and praying really hard to have it but nothing happened.
I had lost the patience which Baba always ask for and which was not in me by that time. I consulted a doctor.
During the treatment, I had a bad reaction to the medication, my weight increased, and by the end of first week, I weighed 7 Kg.
The pain was unbearable, during the day, it used to be all normal, but night used to be painful. I started medicines for sleeping and by few days the body got used to the sleeping injection too and it was miserable.
I was daily pierced 5-6 times for blood testing. I used to always say one thing "Oh Baba what have I done that I am facing all this pain, I don't remember I have ever hurt any one".
Finally, on a Wednesday I told my husband to go to Sai temple and pray to Baba and ask him for the final help and if he wished things will be all right very soon, but the situation was so that he couldn't leave me even for a minute.
On Thursday he left for the temple and there he prayed very sincerely asking Baba to forgive us of our sin and that he would quit smoking which was very difficult for him and will be his devoted devotee all life long.
My husband became Sai devotee after marriage). He returned from the temple gave me prashad and felt relieved at heart that may be things will be better now. That evening, the doctor came and said that she has a new treatment. She wanted someone from my family by me, so, immediately called my mother and father.
My mother is a very blind devotee of Baba and as she came my pain, my trauma all started reducing as though Baba had come along with her. I started recovering to the relief of all the doctors.
However, Baba had something else in his mind as I learnt that I am pregnant and doctor was concerned that it was not safe to have baby in this condition. I was desperate for a child since so long and there was this health crisis too.
Doctor decided to do the ultrasound once again after a week and what she found was more surprising I had not one but two babies!
We cannot explain what we were thinking; the happiness of having not one but two babies and than the tension of their survival was tremendous. But finally we all decided that we will keep the babies and that she will cut down on medicine and I have to recover my self fast to support the babies in the womb. My energy/stamina had gone so down that if I walked 15 steps I would faint and was supplied with lots of glucose, the main concern now was the survival of the babies as by this time my nausea had started and the frequency of vomiting was so much that I couldn't eat anything.
At this time I started criticizing Baba, complaining him for not reducing my pain, or crying as though he is seeing everything still he is not helping me. I had become very negative in my thoughts towards Baba especially after I heard about my pregnancy as I wanted to safely cross that period and here I was still suffering.
I have two lives dependent on me instead he should make my pregnancy comfortable, every time I had any problem. I would look at his photo and cry every time I suffered. It was my mother who always quieted me by saying that I was under weakness and recovery that is why I am being restless and irritating there is nothing Baba is doing he is in fact helping us, may be I would have not survived but Baba all over again blessed me this beautiful life and bear the beautiful babies.
For six months, my mother was the only one who was confident on BABA that he will do everything all right as he has given this blessing of two babies to us he will take care of them. She went to Baba's temple, left rice, tea and non-veg food for me, bought flowers from Baba's paduka and made me touch it, read Sai Satcharitra and Sai Geeta daily and went to other temple too as we are at Nagpur it was near to Shirdi she would send some money to Shirdi for poor and pledged that everything will be alright she would go to Shirdi.
After seven months, we decided to go for an early operation consulted Baba by chit and took out the date though the time for delivery was safe as I had crossed the safe period and that was the day when Baba showed his presence my mother gave me UDI to drink with water before operation and my mom made me speak Baba's name few times and there I was in operation, after half hour I heard the first crying voice of the baby and after a minute another and than little later doctor came and congratulated.
My elder son weighed 3 Kg and the younger son weighed 2.75-kg s she said they are more than healthy. I folded my hand sincerely and thanked Baba for the first time in all that period for listening my mothers prayer and taking care of me and boys I asked forgiveness to Baba for having doubting his love towards me.
I also repented for having cursed him for all that I underwent and since than my faith increased in many folds now I regularly go to Sai temple every Thursday and have more shradha and saburi. My boys are growing beautifully and whenever I look at them smiling and making those cooing noises, I immediately thank Baba. Please all of you Sai devotee I personally ask you to never ever loose faith in Baba as to whatever situation you are in, just keep shradha and Baba will take care .
No wonder why he said "IF YOU LOOK AT ME I WILL LOOK AT YOU".
JAI SAI RAM!
subhasrini
OM SAI SRI SAI JAYA JAYA SAI!!!
Let us pray at the feet of Sai Baba who is the incarnation of all gods and protector of all, to show mercy on us, and increase our devotion towards him.
Topic: Never lose faith in Baba -by Manisha Bisht (Read 2094 times)