Conversation with Baba....my true friend

[vidyarp]

Good morning baba...i feel good when SP and browny come and eat and drink water at our place. I feel very good. Please bless them baba and take care of them. And i feel bad for Snowy....may his soul rest in peace.

[vidyarp]

Happy Birthday dear baba!! Today is Ram navmi....i wish you all the happiness
Baba...i realize that i am neglecting the one thing that is sustaining me. i hope to get over this feeling of frustration and focus on things at hand. baba....i am starting a streak of sorts....pleas help me sustain it.

[vidyarp]

Baba...good morning.
I dont know what's my POA. I am not getting anywhere close to where i want to be. And the sad part is i dont even know if thats what i want. Imagine staying with M 24*7!!! I will prefer death by hanging to that. But baba..isnt it sad? I am wasting the best days of my life. But i know i need the money. For my dear father and family. I dont want to be dependent on anyone ever. But i want my life as well....i think i am not grateful for what i have. All the effort and mehnat ...all the sweat,money and hard work my parents put in...i want to give it all up ...and for what?? Sitting at home watching tv...rubbbish i say.
I want to be gainfully busy and earn a decent living...and where ever i go i need to start from scratch...so why not do it from here...when u have the comfort of earning a regular income...look at supplementing it.Pata nahi...roz naye plan banati hoo

[vidyarp]

Baba...thank you for opening my eyes....i was wasting my time. I now know that i should feel blessed to have the life i have and work towards maximizing it...rather than focus on what i dont have. And if i dont have it...its for a reason i guess....if its something that i can do...i should do it...and if its something i cant do...then i should just let it go...i am blessed to have the job i have ..many ppl would die for it...also for all the efforts that they have put in...i cant let go now...and why should i? nobody can decide on what i should do except u. Also..being here if i dont do my best...then what am i doing? I am just an also-ran..But i am not. I am not an also-ran!! I am someone...i must achieve something in life...i want to show it to all those who put their faith in me tht their faith is not misplaced...and to all those millions who doubted me....here ...take that!
So following my passion is good for weekends and nights.While i am at work..i am at work..period! And its not about asking what my passion is and then working towards it. Its about the kind of life i want. I want the good life...enough money to take care of my father and family...enough to be financially independent for the rest of my life...enough savings for retirement....a garden, a dog and enough food in my kitchen..petrol in my car...travel plans...the list is endless...i dont want the rich life as in the money wise rich expensive life....i want the good life...i may have a small car, a small house..but i should have all of the good food and good travel...friends and family....good books.....
yes thats the life i want...so if thats the life i want...i need to earn and save enough....so get back to work!

[saib]

following my passion is good for weekends and nights.While i am at work..i am at work..period.

Dear Vidyarp,

This is a Million Dollar Statement. Life is what We Create. This is all about Discipline. Life and Time Management is nothing - it is only about priorities and choices we make. Past and Future both are not under our control, Only Present is in our hands ... the moment Called “NOW”, We can live in whatsoever way We want. And the Way We live it decides the level of peace in our life. The Future takes care itself when We take care of Present ! 

May Baba Sai Bless You and All of Us !

om sri sai ram !

[vidyarp]

Dear saib...it is always a pleasure to read your response. And yes...you are right as always - we just have the present and future will take care of itself if we take care of our present.

Thank you for your wise words.

[vidyarp]

Mere maalik...hamesha apni kripa hum par banaye rakhna...

baba...yesterday was a good day work wise...but i still need to get my act together...nahi to i will be in deep trouble. Please baba...sadbuddhi dena sabko....
And baba...hope we all have a good day

[vidyarp]

Dear baba...am back at work today. U know how ill i was for the past 4 days. I feel better today...though not completely recovered. And with all the thinking and contemplating over these few days, i still havent found the perfect solution to my problem..maybe its meant to be this way...But what irks me is when i waste my time doing this thinking...its not an investment i am doing in my life...its just an experience on what not to do in life And history says that when ever i have been confused over my options, i have failed miserably. And when ever i have been focused on what i do, i have excelled. So common sense says that i need to focus on what i do. Question is - is this what i want to do? Well...if not this, then what? i dont have an answer for this. I know what i dont want to do...but i dont know what i want to do. And there is no way on earth i am going to depend on anyone for money. So...i need to keep my life simple...no point in complicating it.

Help me dear lord...to deal with myself...more than anyone else...i seem to be setting up roadblocks for myself!!

[vidyarp]

Dear Baba...good morning. U know how upset i was last evening. I do not like any form of injustice. Galat galat hota hai...choti galti ho chahe badi galti...anyaye sehna aur anyaye karna...dono hi galat hai. Lekin baba...In today's world - where is justice? Be it the mundane daily harsh words that m uses for me...the total lack of respect for me as a family member...or be it bigger issues like justice for Nirbhaya or the little girl who was savaged by those horrible men...where is justice...where is the balance? The law will take next 20 years to hand over a penalty and by then they would have lived their life anyway....I know one thing for sure baba....in my lifetime...there was only once that i wished bad for someone else...and u punished me in the most brutal fashion...and i lost my anchor in life...So i do know that u deliver justice speedily when u wish to. But why do u not use the same speed with others?? U tell me - give up quarrel...i follow ur advice...and then what happens - i am thrown into the fire by m and i dont even try to defend myself!! Unfair baba!!! i am sure u have your reasons...and u work in mysterious ways...but frankly - i dont know where it will lead. All i want is respect and justice.

[vidyarp]

Baba...everywhere i see cut throat competition, no time for friends family..hundreds of ailments and thousands of rupees in the bank ....millions of injustice day in and day out and a handful of kind words/deeds...where are we headed dear lord? This cannot be the world u created. How can u let all this happen?

[vidyarp]

Good morning baba....i dont know why but every where i look, i see anger, frustration and unhappiness. I see greed, lust and ego. What kind of world are we living in? It makes me shudder to think what will happen to my child when he grows up. What sort of a world will he be living in? Is he prepared enough to take on such a world?
I motivate myself daily a million times to do the things i should do...but the fact remains that everyday i yearn for the change.
So i must do what i must do......any decision is better than no decision...

[vidyarp]

Baba gud morning. Its raining today and as usual, the roads were clogged and there was a huge traffic jam all over the city. needless to say, i am late to office today.

Ok - retrospection done: I first need to be honest and sincere to myself. I am not able to keep any commitments even with myself. Forget about interacting with others...i first need to be sure of myself. I realize that i am not interested in what i do and thats the reason for my procrastination. That makes me dis organized and lethargic. what interests me - reading and learning new things. I was bored even in H. So what to talk of I. I dont take pride in what i do and i dont feel compelled to excel since i dont see a reward or positive outcome. But come on - losing weight will surely have an outcome that is so desirable. Then what's stopping me???
I feel i make too big a plan and i collapse under the weight of expectations. Maybe i should try setting simple targets on a day to day basis and see if i can meet them. Then once this is settled, i could go in for a streak kind of thing to bring in consistency.

what say dear friend??

This was written 3 years ago by me....HAHAHAHA...what a joke...i am STILL in the same rut...a differentjob...but same mindset!!
So baba...no one can hlp me if i have chosen to lower my standards and not have a personal branding....if i dont take pride in what i do...who is to blame for it?? Now i know- its not burn out....its LAZINESS

[vidyarp]

Dear baba...this weekend felt like it went on forever. Not that i am complaining. So many things happened. But baba...i am stuck with one fear - that i lack discipline and now everyone has noticed it. And they all think that i cannot achieve anything because i have no self discipline....i know its true...how do i overcome it?

[kamp_kamp]

ALWAYS AT END OF THE DAY MY ALL ENTHUSIAM GOES AWAY . WILL I EVER BE ABLE TO SO SOMETHING WORTHWHILE.

AUM SHREE SAI RAMA

[vidyarp]

I too feel the same way...
I start my day with full energy, make good plans, then somewhere during the day, i slacken my pace...all my plans go out of the window and i dont get anything done. And by the end of the day - i feel i have done nothing and all my enthusiasm is replaced with anger and frsutration..

I have started reading "The Fakir" as suggested by saib. i got it yesterday only. Will let you know how i absorb it....but keep your faith intact and baba will help us through.